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Name: pl001r4827
Location: Saint Helens
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Love ( wherever you may be )

Love

To love (wherever you may be)



On the far horizon, the sun was dying.

Bleeding scarlet into a purple sea.

White cumulus, like blood soaked gauze

Hung silent witnesses to the slaughter of day.

These were the last words you gave to me.

They are etched upon my crippled heart,

Like the epitaph you never wanted.



When at last I sleep the sleep of no dreams,

Do not mark my place of rest with words or flowers.

Let those who seek to disturb me look elsewhere.

Friends in death can search their souls to find me.

Friend in life will always find me in their hearts.



Each night I watch the birth of a million stars

And I wonder which one you are.

A celestial shepherd travelling the night.

Searching out the lost ones to help them find the light.

Light you watched each dawn with life in your eyes.

Light you bore fresh tears for at the ebbing of another day.



You were a guardian of all you came across.

A gift from a god who could not always be here.

Giving back to those who had lost.

Giving direction to those whom would share.

More than an angel, you were love for those with space.

You shook the bonds of loneliness from my heart.

Set free my senses so I could feel and be touched.



You felt my pain for me and cried away my tears.

Then a pause in time and you were gone.

Into the fading light till next we meet.

My heart forever beats the rhythm of your name.

To love, wherever you may be.

POSTED BY PL001R4827 ON TUESDAY 26 SEPTEMBER 2006 AT 12:13
Category: The moaning monk
Tags: friend, love, poem
Geo Tags:  No Location Information
 
 
 

Danni

I met Danni In August 2002.

I was living in a small town in Colorado. Florence.

It was a hot summer day. The temp was around 120 degrees and I had just started a new job. I was restoring parts of an old schoolhouse and turning it into a large house.

I was standing at the top of a 15 foot ladder with a hammer and a crow bar. Ripping down the old ceilings and getting covered in dust, dirt and 40 year old carcases of all kinds of things that had taken up residence there since the place was last used back in 1961.

I heard a voice ask if I need help and I knew it was not the boss. And I was the only one working there. I looked down and saw what I knew was a girl, but what I thought was some homeless vagrant looking for some easy money.

Curiosity got the better of me and I had to go take a better look. From a distance she looked about 18 years old. A typical American teen. Close up you could tell she was older but she did not look the 34 years she turned out to be.

She wore one of those shirts that tie in a knot above the stomach. A pair of denim shorts. Or should I say very shorts. And a big pair of what looked like military boots.

She also had a good selection of piercing’s and a few very colourful tattoo’s.

The minute she started to talk, she impressed me. She spoke with a very strong German accent, and a very confident manner.

She told me all the jobs she had worked and the training she had done. Said she was a resident of Florence for the last 10 years and wanted to work.

Before I knew it I was asking her when she could start if I gave her a trial. She took the hammer and half way up the ladder she said “I have started “. “If you don’t like what I have done for the end of the day, don’t pay me “.

She put me to shame. She worked so hard and was more than capable of doing anything I was doing. We got two of the ten huge rooms done that day and all the rubble cleaned out and loaded into a skip. By the time the boss arrived at the end of the day we were both black from head to foot.

He saw two black workers instead of one, and his confusion showed. But he was so impressed with the worked that had been done, he just handed me $400 and drove away smiling.

Danni got $150 just like me and the other $100 was for tomorrow’s expenses.

Then Danni impressed me again by saying she would pay for the after work drinks at the bar.

Over the next few weeks, Danni and I became great friends. We worked hard together every day. And we relaxed in the bar after work for an hour each afternoon. We also helped each other a lot with different things outside of work. She would fix my bike when it needed it. And anywhere I had to travel to, she would take me. I showed her how to think and write poetry and how to use a computer.

As the work at the schoolhouse progressed more people were working there on any given day. Danni Quickly made friends and everyone seemed to love her.

She always seemed to be there when someone needed help. When ever anyone was troubled she was there to give advice that you would only expect from someone far above her years.

Wherever there was someone in need, Danni was there.

I’m not very religious. But she reminded me of those movies where a stranger comes to a troubled town, and one by one helps out the residents. And then just when everyone is ok again, the stranger vanishes as if sent by god to give a helping hand.

Danni was that stranger to me. And even though I didn’t know it then, it was gonna turn out just like that.

This was a very small town by any standards and most people knew everyone else in town. Or at least knew of them.

I had a pretty wide circle of friends that I used to socialise with on a regular basis. Like every day.

Even though I loved my friends, I have to say they were mostly a very strange bunch. And a few of them were very weird indeed!

At the time, one of them, a very attractive blond, was having husband trouble. Understandable, he didn’t like her being with a boyfriend most nights.

Things came to a head one night and he was found dead the following morning. Shot with one of his own guns.

The plan was for the wife to get rid of the husband to be with the boyfriend. But then the boyfriend didn’t want anything full time, he just wanted to have fun and move on.

Brave man I though, to tell a woman that after what she just did.

So in her grief she told me all about it. Even though I did not want to know. Danni also heard enough of the story to make her get up and leave.

With the husband and the boyfriend out of the way, in steps some other guy. This guy turns out to be Danni’s ex husband. The plot thickens!

Meanwhile, im walking around with information that lots of people think, but no one knows. Apart from me, Danni, the blond, and now Danni’s ex.

I am used to the strange people and strange ways of this place. And im no angel myself. But Danni is very troubled by what she has heard.

So troubled that she talks about going to the police. But she is talking to the wrong people and saying the wrong things. Word of this gets back to the blonde wife and before you know it, Danni gets visits from her ex and warnings that are pretty scary for her. Then he makes the mistake of confronting me when im in the bar playing pool with a couple of ex Special Forces friends. One of my friends takes him to the other side of the bar. And to this day I don’t know what my friend said. But I seen Danni’s go white and his legs began to shake. He left in a hurry.

One morning soon after, I waited for Danni to come pick me up to go to work and she did not arrive. I didn’t worry cos she was late sometimes. She had twelve hungry dogs to do breakfast for every morning.

After half a day at work and no phone call from her I started to worry.

I closed up shop and headed down to her house. When I got there, the place was empty. The neighbours said the only thing the heard was the dogs barking for a little while during the night, and then nothing.

I tried every day to find out what happened to Danni. I know she would not just leave. She couldn’t just leave.

I asked the blonde if she knew anything and I believed her when she told me no. But I will never forget the look and the face of Danni’s ex when I asked him the same question. He grinned and walked away.

That’s when I knew I was going to kill him.

The best friend I ever had walked into my life so suddenly one day. And she left the same way. I had never felt sadness like that ever before. My heart had been ripped out and I was sure the ex had done this.

Unfortunately for me. Or fortunately for him. Whichever way you look at it. I had to leave America very soon after under circumstances beyond my control. So I never got to see Danni’s ex again. Or the blonde. Or my friends. Or even my wife. But more importantly, I never saw Danni again.

That was 3 years ago.  And there is still a point in every day when I miss her.

She always called me “English”. That pissed me off so I always called her “Love”. I knew she hated that.

She loved learning poetry and so I wrote one for her. It is called “ love, wherever you may be “. It is on this site. I hope she reads it some day.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

POSTED BY PL001R4827 ON TUESDAY 26 SEPTEMBER 2006 AT 12:13
Category: The moaning monk
Tags: friend, Lost, colorado, america, missing
Geo Tags:  No Location Information
 
 
 

American justice

What happened to the American justice system?

Was it really 9/11 that screwed things up, or has the system always been corrupt, cruel and twisted??

I am a Brit living in England now, but at the time of 9/11 I was living quite happily in a Sleepy town in Colorado. I had chosen to make that place my home and I was as saddened and angry and dismayed as everyone else at what was happening in New York and elsewhere in the states on that terrible day.

Suddenly the people who I had called my friends started to treat me differently. Not in a hostile way at first, but they were distancing themselves from me.

I lived next door to the police station and chatted to all the officers every day. They too started to look at me differently.

I watched on the news of how Americans were treating Muslims and other foreigners with hostility and I wondered how long it would be before they turned on us all. I am a white protestant but I knew that once this hostility got going, it would not stop until they were attacking even their own citizens.

It happened!

One evening my wife ( an American citizen from birth ) and I were arguing in our garden about plans for my birthday. Some of our police officer friends were watching from the station next door. One of them came over to us and told me I was being arrested for domestic violence. This was a man I drank and played pool with. A man I thought was a friend. I thought he was joking until I was chained to a bench inside the police station and I heard him on the phone to immigration.

That is when the American dream turned into a nightmare for me.

I was taken to the county jail where I spent the next seven weeks in a dormitory with 23 drug addicts, drunks, rapists and child molesters. Eight child molesters actually.( the ratio of child molesters to other prisoners was about 30 per cent. What does that tell you about Colorado??  What does that tell you about America??).

I was then moved to an immigration prison in Denver with even bigger criminals and still without seeing a court or any legal representation.

I called the British embassy and they advised me to plead guilty to any minor charges brought against me or I could be held without charge for up to two years and moved around so that no one would be able to contact or come and see me. These were the new, post 9/11 rules for foreign prisoners held in US jails. The fact that I had not stolen, or crashed any aircraft didn’t seem to matter. The fact that I was from a so called sister country was ignored.

I was put on a starvation diet and told that it was because prisons had to be seen to be giving only healthy food to prisoners. What was really happening was a cost cutting exercise because these jails are private businesses that need to make a profit. I was given drugs I didn’t want or need. I was told they were to stop the spread of infectious diseases inside the jails. And that I came from a country with diseases the Americans did not want. I was also told that if I refused to take the drugs, I would be put into solitary confinement and would be held indefinitely in the US. Amazingly enough, the British consulate said this was true. And legal!

I was amazed at some of the stories of other inmates in this place. Some of them had been in there for years and had still not been sentenced for, or even charged with any crime.

I was told it would take time to sort through all the red tape to get me back to the UK. Probably two months.

Also at this point I was informed that the only charges against me were overstaying in the USA. I was to be deported for this, and also banned from re-entering the states for ten years. In addition I was to be fined $750 dollars which the courts would quash after the ten year ban had expired. How very kind of them I thought.

At the end of another 8 weeks I was escorted ( in chains ) by two members of the homeland security agency all the way back to the UK. I was then also told that I was banned from going back to the USA for 10 years and would be arrested and imprisoned if I tried to return.

And all this was for what??

Because i raised my voice while talking to my wife in our own garden??

The charge....Verbal harassment....What a joke!

They took away my freedom. My dignity and self respect. And, my marriage and the dream I had of making a home in the USA.

What makes this a whole lot worse is the part my own country played in all this. My own embassy advised me to plead guilty to something that I was not guilty of.

So I would be deported quietly no doubt. Heaven forbid I should tell what happened and someone actually listen.

I wrote letters to many, many people in the US asking why something like this happened to me. I got no answers. The police, newspapers, magazines, immigration, homeland security, governors and other political officials and yes, even a few to the Whitehouse. Not one of those people and organization had the common decency to reply to me.

So I ask again. What happened to American justice?

And, just what is it that makes America great now??

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

POSTED BY PL001R4827 ON THURSDAY 5 MAY 2005 AT 10:20
Category: The moaning monk
Tags: justace, prison, 9/11, america
Geo Tags:  No Location Information
 
 
 

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